
Forgiveness is one of the most profound teachings in the Bible, and it’s something we all wrestle with at times. When Peter asked Jesus about forgiveness, it opened up a dialogue that’s still incredibly relevant today. Let’s dive into what Peter’s question reveals and how Jesus’ answer can transform our understanding of forgiveness.
The Question: How Many Times Should We Forgive?
In Matthew 18:21, Peter approached Jesus with a question that’s likely crossed your mind too: “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” Peter probably thought he was being generous. After all, forgiving someone seven times seems like more than enough. But Jesus had a much more radical idea.
Jesus’ Response: Seventy-Seven Times
Jesus answered Peter with a statement that would have shocked his listeners. He said, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:22, NKJV). Some translations say “seventy-seven times,” but the point is clear: Jesus isn’t giving a literal number. Instead, He’s suggesting that forgiveness shouldn’t be limited. It’s a continuous act, far beyond what we might consider reasonable.
Why Seventy-Seven Times?
The number Jesus used isn’t arbitrary. In the Bible, the number seven often symbolizes completeness or perfection. By multiplying it, Jesus is emphasizing that forgiveness should be boundless. It’s not about keeping count but cultivating a spirit of perpetual forgiveness.
The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant
To illustrate His point, Jesus told a parable immediately following His response to Peter. This story is known as the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant (Matthew 18:23-35).
The King’s Forgiveness
In the parable, a king wanted to settle accounts with his servants. One servant owed him ten thousand talents, an enormous sum—equivalent to millions of dollars today. When the servant couldn’t pay, the king ordered that he, his family, and all his possessions be sold to settle the debt. The servant pleaded for patience, and the king, moved by compassion, forgave the debt entirely.
The Unforgiving Servant
However, this servant went out and found a fellow servant who owed him a hundred denarii, a much smaller amount. He demanded payment and, when the fellow servant couldn’t pay, had him thrown into prison. When the king heard of this, he was furious. He called the servant wicked and reinstated the original debt, sending him to be tortured until he could pay everything back.
Lessons from the Parable
This parable powerfully illustrates a few key points:
- Magnitude of God’s Forgiveness: The king represents God, and the immense debt forgiven symbolizes our sins. God’s forgiveness is vast and beyond comprehension.
- Our Responsibility to Forgive: Like the forgiven servant, we’re expected to forgive others as we’ve been forgiven. Holding grudges or seeking revenge contradicts the mercy we’ve received.
- Consequences of Unforgiveness: The parable ends with the unforgiving servant facing severe consequences. Jesus concluded by saying, “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart” (Matthew 18:35, NIV). Forgiveness isn’t just a suggestion; it’s a command with serious implications.
The Heart of Forgiveness
Forgiveness, as Jesus teaches, goes beyond mere actions. It’s about the heart. Let’s break down what true forgiveness entails.
It’s Not About Forgetting
You’ve probably heard the phrase “forgive and forget.” But forgiveness doesn’t mean erasing the memory of the wrong. It’s about choosing not to let the memory dictate your actions or feelings. Forgiveness allows you to release the burden and move forward.
It’s a Continuous Process
Forgiveness is rarely a one-time event. Feelings of hurt and betrayal can resurface, and you might need to forgive again. Jesus’ instruction to forgive “seventy-seven times” speaks to the ongoing nature of forgiveness. It’s a journey, not a destination.
It’s For Your Healing
Holding onto anger and resentment can harm you more than anyone else. Forgiveness isn’t about letting the other person off the hook; it’s about freeing yourself from the chains of bitterness. When you forgive, you allow yourself to heal and grow.
It’s a Reflection of God’s Love
Ultimately, forgiving others reflects God’s love and grace. Just as we’ve been forgiven, we’re called to extend that same mercy to those who’ve wronged us. This act of grace is a powerful testament to the transformative power of God’s love in our lives.
Practical Steps to Forgive
Forgiving someone can be challenging, especially when the hurt is deep. Here are some practical steps to help you on the path to forgiveness:
- Acknowledge the Hurt: Recognize and accept your pain. Don’t minimize or deny your feelings.
- Seek God’s Strength: Pray for the strength and grace to forgive. Remember, forgiveness is a divine act, and we often need God’s help to do it.
- Choose to Forgive: Make a conscious decision to forgive, even if your emotions haven’t caught up yet. Forgiveness starts with a choice.
- Release the Grudge: Let go of your desire for revenge or repayment. Trust God to handle justice.
- Seek Reconciliation (if possible): If appropriate and safe, seek to mend the relationship. This step isn’t always possible or necessary, but it can be a powerful part of the healing process.
- Move Forward: Focus on your future, not the past. Use the experience as a stepping stone to grow and strengthen your faith.
Conclusion: Forgiveness as a Way of Life
Peter’s question and Jesus’ response about forgiveness are more than a conversation—they’re a blueprint for how we should live. Forgiveness is challenging, but it’s also liberating and essential for a healthy spiritual life. By embracing forgiveness, we reflect God’s infinite mercy and open ourselves to His peace and joy.
So, next time you’re hurt or wronged, remember Jesus’ words to Peter. Don’t keep count. Instead, let forgiveness flow freely, just as God’s love and grace flow to you.
FAQs: Peter Asks Jesus About Forgiveness
1. Why did Peter ask Jesus about forgiveness?
Peter’s question in Matthew 18:21, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” reflects a common concern about the limits of forgiveness. Peter likely thought he was being generous by suggesting seven times. His question sought clarification on how often he should extend forgiveness to others.
2. What does Jesus mean by “seventy-seven times” or “seventy times seven” in Matthew 18:22?
Jesus’ response to Peter, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times” (or “seventy times seven” depending on the translation), emphasizes that forgiveness should be limitless. He wasn’t prescribing a specific number but rather indicating that we should always be ready to forgive, far beyond what seems reasonable.
3. What is the significance of the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant?
The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant (Matthew 18:23-35) illustrates the vastness of God’s forgiveness and the expectation that we, having received such grace, should extend it to others. The parable shows the king forgiving an enormous debt, representing God’s forgiveness of our sins, and contrasts it with the servant who refuses to forgive a much smaller debt, highlighting the consequences of unforgiveness.
4. Why does Jesus emphasize forgiving from the heart?
In Matthew 18:35, Jesus stresses the importance of forgiving from the heart to show that genuine forgiveness isn’t just a matter of words or actions but a profound inner change. True forgiveness involves letting go of resentment and offering grace sincerely, reflecting the deep love and mercy of God.
5. Does forgiveness mean forgetting the wrong?
No, forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean forgetting. It’s more about choosing not to let the memory of the wrong influence your emotions or actions. Forgiveness allows you to release the burden of anger and resentment and move forward without being controlled by past hurts.
6. How does forgiveness benefit the person who forgives?
Forgiving someone can bring significant emotional and spiritual benefits to the person who forgives. It helps release feelings of anger and bitterness, reduces stress, and promotes inner peace and healing. Holding onto grudges can harm you more than the person who wronged you, so forgiveness is also an act of self-care.
7. Is it necessary to reconcile with the person who has wronged you?
While forgiveness is essential, reconciliation isn’t always possible or advisable, especially in situations involving ongoing harm or unsafe conditions. Forgiveness is about freeing your heart from bitterness, while reconciliation involves restoring a relationship, which may not be appropriate in all cases.
8. Can you forgive someone even if they haven’t asked for forgiveness?
Yes, you can and should forgive someone even if they haven’t asked for it. Forgiveness is about your response and attitude, not the other person’s actions. It’s a way to release yourself from the grip of negative emotions and reflect God’s grace in your life.
9. How do I know if I’ve truly forgiven someone?
You’ll know you’ve truly forgiven someone when you can think about the situation without anger or bitterness. Forgiveness may not erase the pain, but it allows you to move forward without being burdened by it. If you find yourself continually revisiting the hurt with resentment, you might need to continue working on forgiveness.
10. Why is forgiveness such a central theme in Jesus’ teachings?
Forgiveness is central to Jesus’ teachings because it reflects the very nature of God’s love and mercy. Jesus came to offer forgiveness and reconciliation with God. By teaching us to forgive, He shows us how to live in harmony with others and experience the fullness of God’s grace in our lives.