Divorce is a challenging and often painful subject, especially within the context of faith and the teachings of Jesus.
In Matthew 19, Jesus provides insights on divorce that have sparked discussions and interpretations for centuries.
This article aims to clarify what Jesus said about divorce in Matthew 19 and its implications for believers today.
Setting the Scene: The Pharisees’ Question
Matthew 19 begins with the Pharisees testing Jesus with a provocative question:
“Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” (Matthew 19:3, NIV).
At the time, divorce was a contentious issue among Jewish leaders.
Some followed the teachings of Rabbi Shammai, who believed divorce was only permissible for serious transgressions, while others adhered to Rabbi Hillel’s more lenient stance, allowing divorce for even trivial reasons.
Jesus’ Response: Back to the Beginning
Jesus responds by pointing back to the creation account, highlighting the original intention for marriage:
“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Matthew 19:4-6, NIV)
In these verses, Jesus emphasizes that marriage is a sacred, lifelong union established by God.
By referring to Genesis, He underscores the idea that marriage isn’t just a social contract but a divine covenant.
This foundational view sets a high bar for the sanctity and permanence of marriage.
The Exception Clause
The Pharisees, looking for loopholes, press further:
“Why then did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” (Matthew 19:7, NIV).
Jesus clarifies that Moses’ concession for divorce was due to the “hardness of your hearts,” but it wasn’t part of God’s original plan.
He then introduces what’s often called the “exception clause”:
“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9, NIV)
Here, Jesus acknowledges that while divorce was allowed under the Mosaic Law, it was a concession to human weakness.
He permits divorce only in the case of “sexual immorality” (the Greek word here is “porneia,” which encompasses a range of sexual sins).
Key Points to Understand
- Marriage is intended to be permanent: Jesus’ reference to Genesis reinforces the idea that marriage is meant to be an enduring union.
- Divorce is not part of God’s ideal plan: Jesus highlights that Moses allowed divorce because of human failings, not because it was God’s desire.
- Sexual immorality is the exception: Jesus specifies that marital unfaithfulness is the only legitimate ground for divorce.
The Disciples’ Reaction
The disciples are taken aback by Jesus’ strict stance on divorce.
They say, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry” (Matthew 19:10, NIV).
This reaction underscores how revolutionary Jesus’ teaching was compared to the more permissive views of the time.
Marriage, in Jesus’ teaching, is a serious commitment that shouldn’t be entered into lightly or dissolved for trivial reasons.
Application for Today
Understanding Matthew 19 is crucial for Christians navigating the complexities of marriage and divorce today.
Here’s how Jesus’ teaching applies to modern believers:
Upholding the Sanctity of Marriage
Jesus’ words remind us to view marriage as a sacred, lifelong commitment.
It’s more than a legal contract; it’s a covenant with God and your spouse.
As you enter marriage, it’s essential to recognize this commitment’s depth and to strive to nurture and protect it.
Recognizing the Pain of Divorce
Divorce is often a painful, traumatic experience.
Jesus’ acknowledgment of “hardness of heart” recognizes the brokenness that can lead to divorce.
If you’re facing marital struggles, it’s important to seek counsel and support to address issues before considering divorce.
Addressing Infidelity
Jesus makes it clear that sexual immorality is a serious breach of the marital covenant.
If you’re dealing with infidelity in your marriage, it’s crucial to approach the situation with honesty, grace, and, if possible, a willingness to work towards healing and reconciliation.
However, Jesus also provides the allowance for divorce in such cases, acknowledging the deep betrayal that infidelity represents.
Offering Grace and Compassion
It’s vital to approach the topic of divorce with compassion.
While upholding the ideal of lifelong marriage, we must also extend grace to those who’ve experienced divorce.
Remember, Jesus’ ministry was marked by love and redemption for those who had fallen short of societal and religious expectations.
Conclusion
In Matthew 19, Jesus provides a profound and challenging perspective on marriage and divorce.
He calls us to honor the sanctity of marriage while acknowledging human frailty and the painful realities that can lead to divorce.
As you reflect on these teachings, consider how they apply to your own life and relationships.
Whether you’re married, considering marriage, or dealing with the aftermath of divorce, Jesus’ words offer guidance and hope.
They call us to strive for the ideal while offering grace and understanding in our imperfections.
Final Thoughts
- Seek to strengthen your marriage: Invest time, effort, and love into your relationship to build a strong, enduring union.
- Approach marital challenges with care: When facing difficulties, seek support and work together towards resolution.
- Extend grace to others: Understand and support those who have experienced the pain of divorce, reflecting the love and compassion of Jesus.
Remember, Jesus’ teachings are not just rules to follow but principles to live by, guiding us towards healthier, more fulfilling relationships.
Frequently Asked Questions: Matthew 19 Divorce Explained
1. What does Jesus say about divorce in Matthew 19?
In Matthew 19, Jesus emphasizes that marriage is a lifelong, sacred union established by God.
He highlights that divorce was allowed by Moses due to human hardness of heart, but it wasn’t part of God’s original plan.
Jesus permits divorce only in the case of sexual immorality (Matthew 19:9).
2. Why did Jesus refer to the creation story when discussing divorce?
Jesus referred to the creation story to underline the original intent for marriage as a permanent union.
By quoting Genesis, He showed that marriage is a divine institution where a man and woman become “one flesh” (Matthew 19:4-6).
This reference reinforces that marriage is meant to be enduring and sacred.
3. What is the “exception clause” that Jesus mentions in Matthew 19?
The “exception clause” refers to Jesus’ statement that divorce is permissible only on the grounds of sexual immorality (Matthew 19:9).
This exception acknowledges the deep betrayal that infidelity represents, allowing for divorce when the marital bond is severely broken.
4. How did the disciples react to Jesus’ teaching on divorce?
The disciples were surprised by Jesus’ strict stance on divorce, responding that it might be better not to marry if divorce was so limited (Matthew 19:10).
Their reaction highlights how challenging and counter-cultural Jesus’ teaching was at the time.
5. Is divorce ever part of God’s ideal plan?
No, according to Jesus, divorce is not part of God’s ideal plan.
He points out that Moses allowed divorce due to the hardness of people’s hearts, not because it was God’s desire (Matthew 19:8).
Jesus teaches that marriage should be a lifelong commitment.
6. What should someone do if they are facing marital problems?
If you’re facing marital problems, it’s important to seek counsel and support.
Addressing issues early and working towards resolution can help strengthen the marriage.
Seeking guidance from trusted friends, family, or professionals can be invaluable.
7. How should infidelity be handled in a marriage?
Infidelity is a serious breach of the marital covenant. Jesus acknowledges it as a legitimate ground for divorce (Matthew 19:9).
If you’re dealing with infidelity, approach the situation with honesty and seek to understand the depth of the betrayal.
Working towards healing and reconciliation is crucial, but the decision to stay or divorce is a deeply personal one.
8. How can we support those who have gone through a divorce?
We should approach those who have gone through a divorce with compassion and understanding.
Jesus’ teachings encourage us to offer grace and support, recognizing the pain and challenges that come with divorce.
It’s important to provide a non-judgmental space for healing and growth.
9. How can Jesus’ teachings in Matthew 19 be applied today?
Jesus’ teachings in Matthew 19 call us to honor the sanctity of marriage and view it as a lifelong commitment.
In today’s context, this means investing in and nurturing our marriages, addressing issues early, and seeking to build strong, enduring relationships.
It also involves showing grace and understanding to those who have experienced divorce.
10. What is the significance of Jesus’ teaching on marriage and divorce for believers?
Jesus’ teaching on marriage and divorce in Matthew 19 emphasizes the sacredness and permanence of marriage.
For believers, it’s a call to uphold these values in their own relationships and approach marriage with seriousness and commitment.
It also guides us to extend grace and support to those navigating marital challenges or divorce.
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