Divorce in the New Testament: A Comprehensive Guide

Divorce is a challenging and often heart-wrenching topic, and it’s one that the New Testament addresses with both clarity and compassion.

If you’re navigating this subject, either personally or in a study, it’s essential to understand what the Bible says about divorce and how it applies to our lives today.

In this guide, we’ll explore the key passages in the New Testament regarding divorce, delve into the teachings of Jesus and Paul, and consider the broader implications for modern-day believers.

Key New Testament Teachings on Divorce

Jesus’ Teachings on Divorce

Jesus’ teachings on divorce are some of the most direct in the New Testament.

Let’s break down what He said and what it means for us:

Matthew 5:31-32 – The Sermon on the Mount

In His famous Sermon on the Mount, Jesus addresses divorce with these words:

“It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” (NIV)

Here, Jesus underscores the seriousness of divorce.

In the context of His time, Jewish law permitted a man to divorce his wife for various reasons, often requiring just a written notice.

Jesus raises the bar, indicating that divorce should only be considered in the case of sexual immorality.

This teaching emphasizes the sanctity and permanence of marriage.

Matthew 19:3-9 – Jesus and the Pharisees

In another encounter with the Pharisees, who often tried to test Jesus with tricky questions, divorce was again a hot topic:

“Some Pharisees came to him to test him.

They asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?’ ‘Haven’t you read,’ he replied, ‘that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh.

Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.'” (Matthew 19:3-6, NIV)

Jesus references Genesis, pointing to God’s original design for marriage as a lifelong union.

He continues:

“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9, NIV)

Again, the exception clause (“except for sexual immorality”) is emphasized.

Jesus makes it clear that marriage is meant to be a lasting covenant, only broken under very serious circumstances.

Paul’s Teachings on Divorce

The Apostle Paul, in his letters to the early churches, also provides guidance on divorce, particularly in contexts where believers were married to non-believers.

1 Corinthians 7:10-16 – Advice to the Married

In his letter to the Corinthians, Paul writes:

“To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.” (1 Corinthians 7:10-11, NIV)

Paul reinforces the idea that marriage is a covenant that should not be easily dissolved.

However, he acknowledges that separation might happen and advises that reconciliation or remaining single are the preferable paths.

Paul continues with advice for mixed-faith marriages:

“If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him… But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.” (1 Corinthians 7:12-15, NIV)

Paul emphasizes peace and the possibility of maintaining the marriage if the non-believing partner is willing.

Yet, he provides a compassionate out if the non-believer chooses to leave, recognizing the complexities of such relationships.

The Broader Implications

Understanding these teachings helps clarify the New Testament’s stance on divorce.

Here are a few takeaways for modern readers:

The Sanctity of Marriage

The New Testament upholds marriage as a sacred and lifelong commitment.

Jesus and Paul both emphasize that marriage is not something to be entered into or exited lightly.

This underscores the seriousness with which believers should approach marriage and divorce.

The Exception of Sexual Immorality

Jesus acknowledges that sexual immorality can be a just cause for divorce.

This exception shows His awareness of the pain and betrayal that such acts can cause, providing a path for those deeply hurt by infidelity to find resolution and peace.

The Role of Reconciliation

Both Jesus and Paul advocate for reconciliation whenever possible.

If separation occurs, they suggest that efforts should be made towards repairing and restoring the relationship rather than hastily moving on to new unions.

Compassion and Realism

Paul’s advice to believers married to non-believers shows a balance of compassion and realism.

He acknowledges that maintaining a peaceful marriage in such circumstances is ideal but recognizes the complexities and provides guidance for situations where separation is inevitable.

Divorce and the Modern Believer

In today’s world, divorce rates are high, and many believers struggle with the reality of broken marriages.

How can these New Testament teachings guide you?

Approach Marriage with Seriousness

Understanding the biblical view of marriage as a sacred covenant can help you approach relationships with the gravity and respect they deserve.

Before entering into marriage, consider the lifelong commitment it entails.

Seek Reconciliation First

If you’re facing marital difficulties, these teachings encourage you to seek reconciliation first.

Counseling, open communication, and support from your faith community can be invaluable in striving to repair and restore your relationship.

Know When It’s Time to Let Go

While reconciliation is always the first goal, there are times when it may not be possible.

If you’ve faced unfaithfulness or are in an untenable situation, remember that the New Testament provides a compassionate allowance for divorce in certain circumstances.

Find Peace in God’s Plan

Ultimately, the New Testament’s teachings on divorce encourage you to seek peace.

Whether that’s through reconciliation or moving forward after a separation, God’s desire is for you to live in harmony and fulfillment.

Conclusion

Divorce is undoubtedly a complex and painful issue, but the New Testament provides clear guidance and compassionate allowances.

Jesus and Paul teach us to view marriage as a sacred commitment, to strive for reconciliation, and to approach each situation with a heart of peace and understanding.

Whether you’re dealing with divorce personally or supporting someone who is, these timeless teachings offer wisdom and solace.

Frequently Asked Questions about Divorce in the New Testament

1. What does the New Testament say about divorce?

The New Testament addresses divorce with a strong emphasis on the sanctity of marriage.

Jesus teaches that divorce should only be considered in cases of sexual immorality, while the Apostle Paul advises reconciliation whenever possible and provides guidance for mixed-faith marriages.

Key passages include Matthew 5:31-32, Matthew 19:3-9, and 1 Corinthians 7:10-16.

2. Are there any exceptions for divorce in the New Testament?

Yes, Jesus specifically mentions sexual immorality as a legitimate ground for divorce (Matthew 19:9).

Paul also acknowledges that if a non-believing spouse chooses to leave the marriage, the believer is not bound in such circumstances (1 Corinthians 7:15).

3. Is remarriage allowed after a divorce according to the New Testament?

Remarriage is generally discouraged unless the divorce was due to sexual immorality.

Jesus teaches that marrying another person after a divorce, except in cases of sexual immorality, is considered adultery (Matthew 19:9).

However, the interpretation of remarriage varies among different Christian denominations.

4. What should I do if my marriage is struggling?

The New Testament encourages you to seek reconciliation and healing within your marriage.

This might include seeking counseling, engaging in open and honest communication, and involving your faith community for support.

Jesus and Paul both emphasize the importance of trying to restore and maintain the marriage whenever possible.

5. How should I approach divorce if it seems unavoidable?

If divorce seems unavoidable, the New Testament advises considering the reasons carefully, particularly aligning with the exception for sexual immorality.

Paul’s teaching also highlights the importance of peace and acknowledges that in some cases, especially with mixed-faith marriages, separation might be the best option for maintaining peace (1 Corinthians 7:15).

6. Does the New Testament address the issue of domestic abuse as grounds for divorce?

While the New Testament does not explicitly mention domestic abuse as grounds for divorce, the teachings emphasize the importance of peace and well-being.

Many modern Christian interpretations advocate for safety and personal well-being, suggesting that leaving an abusive relationship aligns with the principles of love and care that are foundational to Christian teaching.

7. How do Jesus’ and Paul’s teachings on divorce apply to modern believers?

Their teachings guide modern believers to view marriage as a serious, lifelong commitment, to seek reconciliation when possible, and to approach divorce with a compassionate understanding of its profound impact.

They also provide frameworks for when divorce might be necessary, encouraging peace and personal well-being in all circumstances.

8. Can I still be a Christian if I’ve gone through a divorce?

Absolutely.

Christianity is centered on grace, forgiveness, and redemption.

While the New Testament sets high standards for marriage, it also offers compassion and understanding for those who have experienced divorce.

God’s love and grace are available to everyone, regardless of their marital status.

9. What resources can help me if I’m dealing with divorce?

Many resources can support you, including:

Faith-based counseling services: Often provided by churches or Christian counseling centers.
Support groups: Many churches offer support groups for individuals going through divorce.
Pastoral care: Speaking with your pastor or church leaders can provide spiritual and emotional guidance.
Christian books and online resources: There are numerous books and websites that provide biblical perspectives and practical advice on dealing with divorce.

10. How can I support a friend or family member going through a divorce?

Support them with compassion, listen without judgment, and offer practical help where needed.

Encourage them to seek professional counseling and remind them of God’s love and grace.

Being a steady, caring presence can make a significant difference during such a challenging time.